The house feels soft and peaceful on this rainy day. I’m the only one home and I’m enjoying the solitude and my books.

In my solitude and enjoyment, I feel spacious enough to contemplate my discomforts with my metamour. I can do so without becoming terribly tense. I can just sit with it and contemplate a wider viewpoint than only my own.

One of the things I’m aware of is that I want to spank people sometimes. I’m not speaking of the kinky sense. I’m speaking of the sense of emotional and verbal disciplining that I think the moment demands. Sometimes my tongue aches to speak…sometimes I let it. I think that at times, people find that rude. Others find it refreshing and useful…affirming.

I am mindful that I need to remember my over all goals in the communication.

I have seen people deliver a masterful, loving, kind correction without any sting whatsoever…in fact, they inspired self love and transformation, inspired the intense desire to grow beyond the narrower self that they started the conversation with.

That seems like a mastery of communication. I’d like to be able to do that…though I frequently think I’d rather just let people sort themselves…I do that mostly. I think it is when I’m in an interpersonal situation in which someone else’s behavior is having an ongoing impact on me, that I start to feel compelled to spank.

Therefore spanking is really about my own emotions, more than it is about the person’s behavior.

I suppose it’s also a form of boundary setting too.

That latter is the way I mostly intend it.

In any case, I’m mostly interested in the rain today. It’s lovely to listen to. I’ve missed it. We haven’t had nearly enough rain.


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