The tension in the air makes my skin keen

sting of a spanking or snap of latigo falls

Your eyes tunnel and claw and I divert with jokes

‘None of that’, your claws say

Awhile later the tears finally overflow

and flow and flow

Dreams wander your room where your back is turned

I am lonely for the presence you share usually

I cry and you just stare and turn away again

Dawn wakes to tears overflow

and flow and flow

My heart whispers, “I don’t want to go…”

Its just that time and again, the tears overflow

and flow and flow

Heart whispers, “Where is the joy in that?”

My heart wonders, “Will I ever be really loved?”

A long silence answers until the tears quiet enough to hear

Heart whispers, “Yes.”

No more. No less. When and how and whom just never seems part of the answer.

Girlish hearts don’t really understand such waiting,

wanting holding and playing and laughing as they do

I see the moment your eyes tunnel and claw into me again and again..

wishing I didn’t feel the need to shutter and divert

wishing no tears overflow and flow and flow

wishing that tunneling and clawing were the kind that claimed and cherished

wishing those scratches were like the sting of a spanking

instead of gouges of rejection

My girlish heart silently imagines snuggling close under your chin

sparks of your smile of unconditional welcome shining in her eyes

when she asks, ‘will you love me….?’

Heart hugs her…

singing stones laughing in the center…

Reposted from Radiance, a private blog, on May 2, 2010

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